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Today's Bitch

Whiners

January 20, 2011

I am sick to death of people who constantly whine and cry about how hard they have it and how life isn't fair and all that crap, and then they don't want any advice or help when it’s offered. No ideas. Nothing. If you aren't handing them money with a scoop shovel so they can continue to waste it on the shit they think is important, they're done with you. Nothing else could possibly be helpful.

This tells me one thing in a big way: They don't want anyone's help, and they don't want to try anything they haven't tried already. They don’t even even want to look for any other answers because then they might actually have to work at making something work, and if it did they'd have to quit crying all over everyone about how miserable their life is.

It's easier to just whine about it. Being perceived as being always in need gives them a fan base of willing saps who will keep bailing them out of trouble and propping them up and telling them it isn't their fault.

Well, here's your wake-up call: IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT because all you do is fucking whine and bitch and jump from one misery to the next because YOU NEVER DO ANYTHING to keep these things from happening.

If I have a problem and I bitch about it to my friends, and if they offer me suggestions, I listen. If I think any of them MIGHT help, I do them. My life has been one giant turd falling out of the sky onto my front porch after another. If all I'd wanted to do was sit and whine about how horrible and meaningless and never ending my troubled life was, then I never would have got the shovel out and worked those turds into my garden. My house would smell like shit, and I would have to use the back door to get in and out.

Some people obviously just want to vent. That’s fine. I vent too, probably more than my fair share, but when I get done venting, I go take care of my problem as best I can and I move on.

The people I'm talking about are the ones who are always whining but don't even want to hear that there might be an answer to their problems. They don’t even want to hear anything to lessen their burden. No. They want to bear all the burden so that they can later say that no one helped them. And the truth is always -- ALWAYS -- that everyone had to help them and everyone who did was more put out than any of them would have had to be if these people had ever gotten off their asses and done any of the things the army of people who had to help them had told them to do in the first place.

Look, here's the truth: America is in a hole. It may get better, or it may not. We all have to live with it. Everyone except the Stinking Rich are looking at a life not quit as rich and full as we had hoped our lives would be.

And we have all done things thinking it was going to get us where we wanted to be, whether it was career choices, marriages, or even having kids. We've all learned the hard way that the things we think will get us right where we want to be and bring us the most joy probably won't. We've all had times when we just needed a little help to get us through a tough time. Some of us listen to the advice we get, and even if we can't use it, at least we appreciate that someone gave it. Sometimes the advice we get saves our lives or the lives of those we love. Sometimes it helps us pay the bills. Sometimes it just makes us feel better about who we are.

Here's the thing: Nice people want to help. People who solve problems of their own all day every day don't want to hear about your problems if you aren't going to want their advice, their help, or at least do anything to help yourself except sit and scream that everyone's out to get you and no one understands your predicament blah, blah fucking blah. We all get it. If we're over 30, we've probably been through as bad, if not worse. What is it with some people that they don't understand that my pain is just as pertinent as theirs, and that what they think is the end of the world I think is merely a stumbling block and visa versa.

What if you make decisions based on what you think the outcome is going to be, and the outcome turns out to be something different that you didn't want at all? Well, welcome to the real world. We have all planted seeds expecting a garden to grow and gotten weeds instead. At the end of the day, the only thing that separates us is how we choose to react when everything we have planned blows up in our face and we're completely screwed. Do we cherish our friends? Do we listen to their well-meaning but sometimes half-assed advice and try to fix the problem? Or do we sit around and blame everyone because we reached into the candy jar of life and pulled out a slick turd instead of a Baby Ruth?

Everyone I know is having a hard time right now -- some worse than others -- and some of us, well we did it to ourselves. Some of us don't deserve the shit that's falling on our head at all. What I've learned over the years is that the people whose own actions, selfishness, and desires got them into the mess they're in are the first ones to cry foul when things don't go their way. The people who have to deal with shit not of their own making bitch a little, and maybe even whine, but then they get to work fixing the problem or just change course completely. They don't expect or ask anyone else to help, but when the help is offered they appreciate it -- even if it's not something they can use.

There are some people who act like they are scarred for life because their parents weren't affectionate, and others who accept a childhood filled with screaming and beatings as par for the course.

It's simple: if you don't want my advice, don't tell me about your problems. I have problems of my own problems that if I told you about them and you gave me good advice I would do and probably have done. If you just need to vent and don't want any answers, then here's my advice -- which you won't take -- go to someone who doesn't give a shit what happens to you and tell them about your problem, and then take care of your own problem your own damn self and then bitch later about how you had to do it yourself because no one would help.

Selina

If you enjoy these bitches, please contact Selina directly at selinarosen@cox.net. Thanks!

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